I have a confession to make…
The older I get, I become a bit more of an introvert. As I type that, I swear there are casinos in Vegas who have just shuttered their doors because they paid out all of those who took odds against it. I mean, we’re talking “life of the party” to “can I just stay in my PJ’s all day?” Ask my parents, I seriously caught one entire season of Family Ties because I was consistently grounded for refusing to adhere to curfew. Now that I’m a parent and I’m over 40 I can safely say “nothing good happens past midnight….really….. no, really” however as a 17 year old I really just thought I would miss something spectacular.
I’m even a recluse at the bus stop. Granted, the bus stop is MY FRONT YARD so while I absolutely adore my neighbors (thank you Jesus for giving me a rockin’ street) I can’t justify getting out of my pajamas and slippers to stand 50 feet from my warm home to talk to them for 5 minutes. Terrible, I know…but just another sign that I’m turning intro an introvert.
(I love you nabes, I really do, but I treasure my warmth and taking my dog out for 20 yards of complete walking is like driving to Nordstroms and sitting in the car; just cruel.)
I have to be careful, however, that I don’t spend too much time alone. Alone isn’t good for everyone…in fact, I’d venture to pontificate (I know, big word, eh?) that it really isn’t helpful for anyone to spend too much alone time. We were MADE to create. We were MADE to be in community. Hermits were the people who the bible made a point of specifying that they lived in caves outside of the village. Jeesh, I don’t want to be a cave dweller, for the love!
So while I crave the solitude…the comforts of home… the freedom to listen to a Podcast at volume 20 or dance to the Biebs with no one watching, (yes I did.) I must also connect.
Living in a transplant community also means that being in community is easier. There’s always someone that has been here for less time than you, or, someone just lost their best friends because of a relocation so in other words, almost everyone’s social “dance card” is open. “Now accepting friend-resumes” I like to say. In this way, you get to pick and choose who you want to hang out with, collaborate with, dream with.
In the beginning of 2017 I wrote down that one of my goals was to “enlarge my world.” Between writing and also being a Realtor (my other passion and what keeps my mind active when not writing or speaking) both of these are pretty isolating if you let them. So, my goal was to make sure I was continually looking for people that I would want to call “new friends.” Friend shopping, if you will.
I’m sure I could do a MUCH longer blog post about this because I feel like I’ve already drug you behind the car wayyyy to long to get to my point BUT I just have to tell you, encourage you, push you…. to always be on the look out for new friends. You never know why God causes an intersection between two people but sometimes you just have to flat out stand in awe and appreciation when he does.
Today I sat down and had coffee with a woman I had never met, but thanks to Social Media, our lives crossed paths and I pursued that little nudge in my head that whispered “you should know her.”
Ever have one of those nudges?
Pursue it…. that is God
trying to speak to you.
It should come as no shock that immediately the two of us started talking as if we had known each other our whole lives…. the conversation flowed without ceasing and truly looked like a fly on speed if you were to chart the topics and segways and circling back (maybe it was the caffeine? Hmmmm.) Anyway, we both leaned back at one time with a bit of whimsy in our eyes and said to one another, “I can’t believe this is the first time we’ve met!” I believe that she encouraged me, I encouraged her and we were even able to offer advice and help each other dream… or at the very least, sort through some of the things on our hearts.
Please let me insert a disclaimer in here… sometimes there are hidden seasons and I get that. Sometimes there are times where we need to just pull back and do some soul searching, get some rest and prioritize. Goodness knows we can fill our calendars to the brim with busy….and then fight off the temptation and signs of sheer burnout from the schedule we created. So dear sisters, if that is you right now, that’s okay. Give yourself permission to take a season of pajamas and coffee and podcasting or painting or reading or whatever you need to reset. And then…..
Get out and look for those intersections. Don’t dismiss the nudge of extending yourself out there and connecting with that new person. You just ever know what that relationship will bring.